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Ask Jeff & Anthony

The grass is always greener!

Submitted By: Jeff
Date: March 30

In Answer To: Can I change from being gay??? (JJ)

First of all, let me state unequivocally, that the vast majority of programs that claim to change sexual orientation, whether they be through hypnosis, religious counseling or anything else, FAIL to change the actual sexual orientation of the individual. They may succeed in getting the person to change his sexual BEHAVIOR...but this is as cruel as asking a straight guy to lead a life dating only other men!

Even considering such a change means you've "bought into" to the thinking of homophobes who believe that homosexuality is wrong. In fact, there's are totally valid reasons for the existence of homosexuality in the natural order of living things.

You sound like dozens of heterosexual girls I know who have the exact same complaints about men in general. What's critical to remember is that if the quest for love were not a challenge (for both straight AND gay people), then finding love would never be so cherished!

Blaming your troubles on being gay is really just a cop-out. Anthony's advice about stepping back and focusing on other things is a good one. Life comprises love and romance, but it also comprises millions of other things. Nurture some friendships. Pursue some hobbies. Discover some talents. Most importantly, learn how to love yourself. You might not find the love of your life tomorrow, or even a month from now. Or then again, maybe you will. But you'll learn how to change your mindset and really start enjoying and appreciating life.

Please write us back and let us know how it goes.

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