Ask Jeff & Anthony

It's your decision to make...

Submitted By: Jeff
Date: June 6

In Answer To: Only child - should I come out??? (Jason)

The decision about whether to come out to family and/or friends is your decision to make, and yours alone. In the ideal world, anyone can tell his parents he is gay, and there's wonderful acceptance and everyone lives happily ever after. Clearly, that's not the case in the real world. If you feel your life would be happier and things would be better off without telling your parents, then that's a perfectly valid decision to make.

Since you're raising the issue, I think your conflict is that you'd inherently LIKE to come out to your parents. And if that's the case, I think you should give it some time and reassess whether you may be prepared to come out to them in the future. It may well be that they are suspect that you might be gay. Another possibility to consider: your parents might actually be mad at the fact that you felt it necessary to keep your sexuality a secret from them, ESPECIALLY since they've already dealt with homosexuality and AIDS. So rather than NOT telling them, they might think you would be MORE LIKELY to tell them. Again, it's food for thought.

In my own case, I resisted coming out to my parents for years. When I finally did it, I embarked upon a course that has brought me closer to my parents than I've ever been. Whatever you decide, keep us updated!!!

Questions In This Thread

• Only child - should I come out???
  Jason -- March 7
  • It's your decision to make...
    Jeff -- June 6
    • Re: It's your decision to make...
      Jason -- June 8

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