Ask Jeff & Anthony

Have some self respect

Submitted By: Anthony
Date: August 12

In Answer To: In a pickle (A)

You are being so weak and pathetic, I am surprised this guy is still talking to you at all. I don't know why I bother giving advice on these kinds of situations because I know that if you were strong enough to follow it you wouldn't have written to me in the first place so it kind of becomes like casting my pearls before swine (as they say). This guy is walking all over you and you are the one who is suffering because you have developed these feelings for him or whatever. If you were really intelligent and had any self respect whatsoever, this is what you would do. You have to make a separation. I am not saying that you can't talk to him at all, but it is important that you spend only as much time with him as is healthy for you. You have to take your relationship from what is now in somewhat of a gray area to one that is completely platonic. You shouldn't be doing anything with him that you wouldn't do with your other friends. Show him that you are strong enough to get by without him. In the end he will respect you more for this. Right now I wouldn't be surprised if he had very poor regard for you. When a guy treats me in the manner that you have just described to me, I am generally amused but could never consider the person as an object of actual interest. As far as "thinking about him all the time," you need to stop that. Find out what your interests are and find a way to pursue them independent of him. Read, watch movies (no Titanic bullshit!), surf the web, go out and meet new people, possibly even date. Find out what makes you you and forget about what makes him like you. Just make sure that you don't "flaunt" your new independence when you hang out with him. This will blow everything and send you in a downward spiral. OK, now the choice is yours. I hope that you take my advice. If you have anymore questions, feel free to email me.
Anthony

Questions In This Thread

• In a pickle
  A -- August 12
  • Have some self respect
    Anthony -- August 12
  • You're going to have to get over him...
    Jeff -- August 19

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