Ask Jeff & Anthony

It's called "reaping what you sow..."

Submitted By: Jeff
Date: April 27

In Answer To: How come I keep finding only one-night stands??? (Diego Martin)

If you are constantly finding people interested solely in sex, the problem is not that you haven't been to enough countries. The problem is that you are going after the wrong guys!!! Or you are looking in the wrong places!!!

Rather than jump into your next relationship, you need to devote some more time into finding and evaluating your prospective partners. Chances are you're treated like a "sex toy" because you're making yourself to easily available sexually. Or fidning people in places where people are expecting a quick sexual experience. Playing hard to get for a few weeks is a surefire way to weed out those who are looking for a quick fix. Just the mere mention that you like to "wait before having sex" might screen out a good 50% of people before even going on a first date! Also, you mention you're a dancer and model, which might make it easy to attract very good looking guys. But you might find that a more down-to-earth guy can be much more interested in developing a long term relationship. In other words, try to expand your pool of potential partners to include those just slightly outside your normally "acceptable range of attractiveness." You might be surprised at just who you might find!

All this advice assumes that you are genuinely interested in a long term relationship. I can't tell you how many guys I know who talk about the ideals of love and long-term relationships, but are more than happy to jump into the first fling that comes along. So definitely make sure it's what you really want before you begin complaining about not having it!!! And then take the steps to find your true love, slowly and surely! He's out there, he's near you, and he's waiting to be found.

Questions In This Thread

• How come I keep finding only one-night stands???
  Diego Martin -- April 20
  • It's called "reaping what you sow..."
    Jeff -- April 27

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