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Bi Man is using me?

Submitted By: trouble in paradise
Date: December 8

Hi Jeff & Anthony. My lovelife is a complete mess and i don't know what to do? I have been with my partner for 13 years now. 5 years into the relationship, i fell out of love. My partner Ray did not. My dissatisfied love life caused relationship problems and alot of fighting. The fighting reached a point where i couldn't take it anymore and i moved out. But Ray did everything he could to stay in my life. While i was out on my own, i ran into Gary, a friend of ours. When we first met we were both highly attracted to each other. So once Gary found out i was on my own, he wanted to move in with me because he was now on his own and lonely too. Within a week, we were both very much in love with each other and we started drinking and doing drugs until finally my money ran out. My partner found out and kicked Gary out when he finally made me an offer...move back in with him as roommates and he would take care of me financially. I felt like i had no choice but to go back. A month later, Gary was calling me and wanting to see me. Eventually i agreed and the romance started all over again. He apologized for putting me in financial debt and still has big dreams for us. I started seeing Gary again but everytime i saw him, he needed something. Money for his kids presents, cigarettes, shoes, alchohol...drugs. Gary has no job and is awaiting a settlement and is trying to get on Social Security for his depression. Since i am still living with my ex and have plenty of money, i kept buying him things....i didn't care, i put it on credit cards, paid with cash. I rang up over 3,000 dollars of debt. It didn't matter. The fighting with my ex started up again and became worse when my ex found out that i was still seeing Gary behind his back. The emotional stress caused me to have a heart attack, that's how bad the verbal abuse got. Now, Gary is living with a friend who has a huge house with an extra bedroom he rents out. Gary sleeps on the floor in the living area. But the roommate is leaving this month and the room will be available for rent at a price i can afford. Of course i want to live with Gary and be with him for the rest of my life as i feel he is my first true love. But the limited income i have will not support us both. And..i am still emotionally attached to my ex partner. I'm scared of taking off and starting a new life with a new love who has no money and who still needs something everytime i see him, today i spent 80 dollars on him when i can barely afford that. Gary is sincere and i believe he will pull through and i am very sure that he loves me. But i'm just scared to move on and take that jump. Also, i don't like anal and Gary insists that i will have to give it up once we decide to move back in together. He's not pushy about it but it will be expected of me. My ex is not making this easy because he is telling me he will move out of state the day after i move so there will be no second chance. The ex says Gary is known throughout the neighborhood as crack head Gary. Quite frankly, i'm beginning to think it's true. I don't know what to do or who to trust...both Gary and Ray tell me things about the other one to make them look good, because these 2 are arch enemies..they can't stand each other. both of them mess with my head and like i said, i don't know who to trust Can you please offer me some advice....time is running out.

Questions In This Thread

• Bi Man is using me?
  trouble in paradise -- December 8
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    The Kurfew Krew -- September 23

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