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Need some guidance

Submitted By: Guy
Date: 3/3

Dear Dave,

First of all, I want to say that I admire what you did very much and I wish I had that much courage. Thanks for setting a good example, it’s inspired me to at least go this far.

It’s the same old story I guess. I think I’m gay. I’m pretty damn sure actually - but I don’t want to be. I have so many mixed emotions and I just don’t know what to do. I definitely am attracted to certain guys, but I think I’m also attracted to certain girls as well. I guess I could be bi, but again I don’t know. I’m not sure if I actually am attracted to the girls that I think I am, or if it’s just that I like them as people, of if not being gay is so ingrained in me that I make myself attracted to them. But regardless, I don’t want to be gay. Maybe in a perfect world I would, but I just can’t seem to make myself want to be. If I had no family, then I think I definitely would fell different and come out. But it’s not that my family would resent me or anything. (Well, not my parents at least) In fact, they’re very open minded and I think that they wouldn’t treat me any differently. (In fact, I know that my dad is bi-sexual, and my mom has said a few times that we’re all attracted to both sexes a little bit) So, it’s just that I don’t want my parents, and little sister especially, thinking of me in that way.

Plus, my school is very conservative and would outcast me in general, I know. I have some very good friends, but I don’t think that they would stay that close if I came out. Not very many of them are very open-minded. However, my best friend, I’m pretty sure would support me. The only thing is that I have a feeling that he is gay as well, and he might come out if I did. Sounds great I know, but I am not attracted to him AT ALL and if he approached me and I told him that then it would ruin the whole relationship. Then I would have nobody and I know how much fun that is. It took me a little while to fit in and find a good group of friends, but I did and I really don’t want to risk it all. I’d say that I’m fairly popular (on Students’ Council, etc), but, yeah… I just don’t know what to do.

I know that this isn’t really a question, and more of an essay, but please – any guidance you can give me would be really appreciated. Thanks dave.

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